Bobby could see Bobby could see the depth in Gomez, but just couldnPt get in- side it. He was a man close to his roots, at times eating them to stay alive, probably. From atop the walkway gratings he could see the chains taut, locked on, bitching and grating noises coming from them as they bound against the torque of the shafts. It was the grotesque king of scream only steel on steel could make, but to Bobby it could just as easily be The Lady. He fig- ured the chains were strong enough, but didnPt — 145 — want to think about the power of an ocean tug pulling them in the open Gulf. The beam from his flashlight ran across the shafts, dancing hastily across the bloodstains across the bloodstains on the burned-up electrical panel. Somebody should wash them off, he thought.
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He figured that was HowiePs job as his eyes carried him unaware to the dark water where Forster died. Seeing it, he flicked the beam off and cringed as the experience washed over him. He saw part of ForsterPs face splatter on him again. He tried to make every- thing still. Still, the sight remained, as if the experience was all that was ever there. Inside the absolute darkness of his mind he saw it. There wasnPt a lot you could do when the picture wouldnPt turn off, when black was the medium. And it got spooky quickly for Bobby L surreal. To escape, he To escape, he had to leave. His eyes were only half open as he started his way along and up the inside companionway. He worked to calm himself while his pace quickened. Think simple, he told himself, make it nothing L
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the way it was when youPre a kid and the crocodiles are going to bite your foot if you donPt get it up into bed and under the covers. Or snakes. Bobby always preferred crocodiles. They were slower, bigger, and noisier, too. It didnPt help. His heart pounded and the companionway stayed dark. The motion of the ship cooperated. The ominous sounds of the grating chain became her voice as the elements around him combined in — 146 — — 146 — a strange unity. He felt her at his feet with each rung of the walkway, not wanting him to leave without the promise, reminding him with each step. The promise. She demanded it. The prom- ise to avenge her. His fear got him topside, into the late after- noon sun, into the world above, light and life. Leaning heavily on the stern rail, he
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watched the dead wake curl out from under her. He took all the time he needed to catch himself. For want of something to put in his head he noticed she sat a little deeper in her stern. It wasnPt much, but it helped. Somebody working the it helped. Somebody working the deck of the stern tug waved from the distance. He raised his arm ab- sently, as Gomez slipped back into his mind. He wanted to check on him, get some human contact. He realized if Gomez died hePd get the money for nothing. On the way he stopped off in the crewPs quar- ters beneath the stern wheelhouse and scrounged some partially decayed blankets, heading out through the ransacked galley. There was nothing to take there; it had been stripped of everything. Back at the forecastle, Gomez appeared to be sleeping. Bobby checked him
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to be sure it was just sleep. Satisfied he was not yet alone, he spread two blankets over his friend, trying to slide one under his one under his head without waking him. Gomez moaned and produced low, inaudible Spanish. He pulled his own gear over close to him as the Mex- ican came around. MMucha siesta, amigo.N Bobby said it low as — 147 — he rummaged for the sensimilia and rolled a joint. He drew a glow from it and held it out to him. Gomez shook his head. MI stay, Bubby. MYo travajo mucho, amigo. Anything.N MSi, amigo.N Bobby found it curious how the two of them interchanged the language now, fig- ured it must be some kind of mutual compliment. MCompaneros.N Bobby smiled the words across to him. Gomez emitted a soft noise a soft noise with his
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response. MGracias, mucho, amigo.N It was the kind of quiet muffle that meant he hurt. Bobby laid down on some of the cot matting hePd dragged from the officersP quarters earlier and slid the box of Oreos to Gomez. He wanted to tell him about the feelings hePd gotten from The Lady in the engine room but didnPt. MEverythingPs under control.N He looked at his watch. MItPs four- thirty.N Saying it aloud, he realized he was late calling in. He checked the tug, fighting the irri- tation of the static as he awaited a response. They came back and reminded him he was late. Bobby was thinking motion and distance while his voice distance while his voice crackled and broke into theirs. It was done quickly and he was off the air as if hePd never been on. Lying on his side now, Gomez is settled
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and quiet. Bobby watched the menagerie of bugs running about under the chunks of rust and garbage. He fought to leave the spook of the engine room be- hind. He wanted to sleep, to move only inside his — 148 — thoughts. They were his thoughts, nobody else would give a damn about them, why should any- one. It was irrelevant to everybody and every- thing but himself. But he had them L ownership through default. It was his world because he was the only one the only one who showed up in it. He stopped himself. Another lizard skittered across his deck level line of sight. He wondered if it was the same lizard. He wondered where he had been L where he was from. The lizard stopped suddenly and stared back at him L eyeball to eyeball. He was watching the lizard watch him
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when it opened its mouth and spoke to him. MJustice, promise her justice.N He did, and just like that he got safe. It was almost six oPclock and they hadnPt seen land for a couple of hours. Bobby figured they should get it back as they approached the Pilo- town rendezvous. HePd rendezvous. HePd known without looking theyPd left sight of land. The sway and pull of The Lady Inca increased with the swell of the Gulf. It would be a roller coaster once they were secured to the sea tug and moving straight out into the open Gulf. The thought enticed Bobby to linger in sleep. He took a few moments looking for a dream. Re- ality was too persistent at the moment. The two-way jostled Bobby from his meander- ings. Bobby answered. MShip to tug. I read you, five by five.N — 149 —
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MPilotown in sight. Make ready to transfer lines.N MRoger.N The radio broke up on him. MLet go bow him. MLet go bow lines first. Let them get you in tow before you detach us astern. Over.N MRoger.N MAre you shipshape?N Bobby looked across at Gomez who knew the question without the English. MRoger.N He smiled at Gomez without conviction. MWePre healthy.N Gomez said nothing but his eyes thanked Bobby for his silence. Bobby noted it and headed to the bow lines. He got his first glimpse of the giant sea tug coming at them fast from landward. He struggled to unbind the towlines while the sea tug closed the gap. It was a two-man job but he managed. Waiting for the loudspeaker command, he let go the bow lines just as the sea tug came along- side. With side. With the forward
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tug freed, The Lady’s bow started a drift shoreward as the stern tug pulled her seaward. TheyPd tow her astern into the Gulf current while the sea tug locked on forward. He knew theyPd want her tied up fast once the lines came aboard. More work. He wondered how much line theyPd let out once they were into the Gulf. It was a solid half-mile to the shore. Visibility at that distance was poor, but the shoreline had lost its bayou appearance. He checked his watch L it was just past seven. The sky, too, said it was evening, but with a peculiar hue. He noticed the wind was up. — 150 — — 150 — The sea tug was close up on the starboard, much bigger than the harbor tugs. She looked up to the job, almost new, capable of using a lot of power.
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Hercules Two was written across her bow- sides in large white letters. It made him feel bet- ter for no justifiable reason. The radar scanner sitting atop the wheelhouse helped, too. Her captain stood prominently in the wheel- house. He probably had a three-man crew. It was right alongside now, bumping rubber against the peeled steel of The Lady. On a muffled word through the loudspeaker, the lead line shot up and across the bow, whistling past BobbyPs head. MThar she MThar she blows,N he mum- bled, expecting to see Beluga spouting nearby. Scrambling across the bow he got the lead line, knew he wouldnPt be hauling nylon aboard. These guys had the advanced technology. TheyPd go lead line to one-inch nylon to steel cable. Cable was a three-man job, bearable with two. The loudspeaker vibrated sound again. MFeed through port bulwark.N He felt the weight
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grow as the cable cleared the water. Everything was heavier coming out of the water, he thought, just like evolution. The cable took time, came up grating over the deck railing, grinding against the bulwarks. His arms started to ache from fatigue. The cable did- nPt flex easily. His gloves were ripping up from the jagged cable the jagged cable threads. Twice the cable pulled up hard against his bare torso. Thin red claw marks ran across him, small rivulets of blood mix- ing with his sweat. — 151 — From a distance the effort had the appearance of smooth, poetic metaphor, flowing rhythm. It was manPs statement, his place in the struggle. Up close, it was sweat, curses and man in labor. It was noble perhaps, but there was no baby to show for it. Bobby leaned back against the winch. Ex- hausted, he looked
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up into the sky where his daughterPs face emerged, and cornered him. Her hope-filled eyes Her hope-filled eyes promised him eternity. He felt the sea breeze and heard The Lady Inca promise she would get him to her. The steel slap of cable against The Lady’s rail brought him back quickly. MWe are roger and go aboard ship.N He mouthed into the two-way, his first opportunity to check it against the tugPs radio. MTake it up real slow, shePs gonna mill tight. Over.N It was only a few minutes before the slack started disappearing. MTaking slack. Stay sharp up there. Over.N The grind and rasp moved into full swing. The eerie metal scraping of the bind grew louder as grew louder as the cable tightened. This was not a sound to sleep by. Grind and scrape, baby, he thought to himself. Wind
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yourself so tight you never come free. Just pull me home. MYouPre tight. Cables secure.N His own insur- ance policy surfaced. MCome back with weather. Over.N MThree day weather watch across the Gulf. Over.N Thanks for nothing. Weather watch could mean anything from light rain to the end of the — 152 — world. MRequest four-hour radio checks. Over.N He didnPt want to be forgotten for too long, to get too ignorant about the weather movement. MCast off stern lines.N The sea tug is sea tug is taking charge. MYouPre under tow from us now.N He could feel the unsteady lurching already, the gnash and bang of the cable against the Lady. To Bobby it rang like life. He watched the big tug start a slow turn to sea, cable reeling off her deck. MShip to tug.N He spoke as he headed forward. MGive me an
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ETA Brownsville.N The radio broke up. He slapped it. MOver.N META Brownsville forty-eight hours.N It died again, came back as static muffle. MThursday. Same time. Over.N MRoger. Radio check.N The two-way was leav- ing, but he kept talking anyway. MMidnight. Over.N It was done. They were They were underway. He noticed her hogging more severely than before and hoped it was because they were still running cable out. Night started to close in. The sky grew clouded and full-blown, unlit and omnipotent. He got rations and weather lamps from the forecastle storage. He found Gomez half-asleep, fed the two of them, and talked a little. He tried to get com- fortable. Drifting off to the ocean around him, he saw his daughterPs face before him. It was all he had, and it was enough. — 153 — International Salvage Brownsville, Texas Tuesday
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International Salvage Brownsville, Texas Tuesday Night The senator sat in Hertzel MarkovitzPs office at International Salvage. He tapped a pencil slowly and with irritating regularity as he lis- tened to Hertzel alternate between arrogance and squirm. Enrico, EstaphanPs specialist in pest control, stood at the door, a big, shiny-suited statue L cold, smart, and very predictable. The senator was working EstaphanPs side of the tracks, following the party line. He presented a new, secretive attitude to an old business part- ner, letting Hertzel roast slowly, while he put ef- fort into assuring Enrico knew where his loyalty lay. MWe picked MWe picked him up at the ship this morning.N Hertzel talked while he took a seat on the couch across the room. MCharleyPs driving him back, tak- ing him to his trailer on South Padre.N The strain was starting to show on HertzelPs face. MThey got
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him to a doctor in New Orleans, patched him up.N He watched Enrico the executioner out of the corner of his eye. MItPs all hushed, senator.N — 154 — MHow do you know?N The senatorPs pencil tap- ping picked up the tempo. MWePve got a lot of peo- ple still knowing about this.N Hertzel was shuffling. MWe can take care of the boys on the ship. No problem. TheyPre no- bodies. TheyPre no- bodies. NobodyPs going to notice.N The senator surveyed the shuffle. MWhat about your ace idiot Morgan?N MCharley called me from the highway a few hours ago. They should be in early tomorrow morning.N Hertzel got into his positive mode. MHePs okay. We can hide him out.N Hertzel said it like it was good news. MHePll be okay.N The senator questioned the intelligence of HowiePs continuing good health. He waited for Hertzel to absorb
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it before moving on. MWhat about the doctor?N MThe gunshot wound? Is it going to end up in a up in a police report?N MDonPt worry,N Hertzel said. MWe own the doc- tor. HePs a quack, no license, no need to report anything.N The senator snapped the pencil, as it slammed hard on the desk. MYou get some quack addict to patch him? We shouldnPt worry? You better start worrying, Hertzel!N He pulled his giant frame from the chair as the storm in his eyes headed to- wards rage. MI donPt want any loose ends here, Hertzel. Neither does Houston. TherePs the doc- tor. And the other two L the ones still on the ship.N The senator was almost talking to himself now. His voice had gone soft and wishful, as and wishful, as if it was his Christmas list. He glanced
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quietly be- — 155 — tween Hertzel and Enrico. MSome people might even consider adding your name to the list of loose ends.N Hertzel had clarification now. The implication was obvious. MYouPve given us quite a list of loose ends here, Hertzel.N The senator sat down. An eerie and powerful calm settled on him, as if he could crush Hertzel just with the words. MI guess a lot de- pends on how you handle yourself from here on in. How well you take care of some of these loose ends yourself.N Hertzel lifted himself from the couch, his eyes moving more than they should. MRelax, senator. ThisPll get sorted out. get sorted out. I already arranged for this Bobby character to take care of the Mexican.N The senator saw he was looking to get off the list. MOnce hePs back, wePll take care of him.N MAnd
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Howie? WePre going to have Lloyds and the cops all over everything before this is over.N The senator leaned back, his arms behind his head. MThis Howie character is a loose cannon, Hertzel.N MLike I said, HowiePs on his way back now. I can take care of it. No problem.N MDonPt rush it on Howie.N The senator kept his mind on business. MYou said there were loose ends? The cops. Lloyds. We donPt want We donPt want him dis- appearing too mysteriously, too soon.N The sena- tor let the message linger. MSend him to the farm for a holiday. He wonPt get suspicious. HePs been there before.N The senator smiled, feeling a little more as if hePd gotten everybody in place. MTell — 156 — him we got new whores up there.N He glanced over for EnricoPs silent approval. EstaphanPs man just kept staring. MNo problem,
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Senator. IPll make sure Howie tidies everything up before I cut him loose to you. Yeah, loose ends. I had two calls waiting for me when I got back here. Some New OrleansP cop.N He pointed to the document on his desk. MAnd Lloyds.N The Lloyds.N The senator picked it up. MThey didnPt have a copy. WePve got HowiePs.N The senator looked at it, kept listening. MI faxed them a copy already.N Hertzel smiled. MIt seems this Robert Forster never made it back.N Nobody joined the humor wave, an intentional omission. MNo loose ends Hertzel.N The senator stayed tunnel-visioned. MNone.N MOkay. Okay. We keep Howie to talk to them.N Hertzel had the theme. MHePs okay when hePs straight. He can pull it off.N MThen hePs gone.N The senator still didnPt look up from the document. MA vacation to the farm. A permanent one.N When he did
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look up, it was to imply the meeting imply the meeting was about over. MIPve got to get a ten oPclock flight back to Austin. IPll get this sit- uation back to Houston.N He headed for the door- way. MGet me this doctorPs name and whereabouts. Tomorrow morning.N He was on his way out, Hertzel trailing him. MNo loose ends.N They got outside. Hertzel stood at the car door as the senator climbed in. MWhat about the goon, Henry? I donPt want him around. He makes me — 157 — nervous.N MHePs here to keep an eye on things, Hertzel.N The senator gave him solid eye contact as he set- tled onto the seat. MI donPt blame you for being nervous.N you for being nervous.N He enjoyed the discomfort, figured it was time Hertzel got a feel for heat. MBe good to
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him. HePs got a lot to say about your future.N The door closed as the window lowered. Hertzel followed the beckoning crook of the sena- torPs finger from the open window. Up close, he grabbed Hertzel by the throat like a vice and pulled him against the window frame, cracking his glasses against his forehead. His voice was low and cruel. MWePve got some problems here, Hertzel. People will die to take care of your fuck- ing greed. ItPs very inconvenient, doesnPt look good.N Spit hit Hertzel in hit Hertzel in the face, MYou should really start worrying about ending up with your balls up your ass.N Hertzel gagged for breath as the senator re- leased him, holding his throat, and wiping spit from his face. His twisted glasses fell to the gravel as the car disappeared into the darkness. MYou cocksucker!N The senator didnPt hear,
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he was too busy smil- ing. The shaft broke loose somewhere close to mid- night; right after the faulty radio check with the tug gave a garbled weather warning. The scream- ing didnPt start right away, not until the free-spin- ning shafts had burned off most of the oily sludge — 158 — in the engine room, depriving her of makeshift lu- brication. of makeshift lu- brication. The eerie increase of the noise and vibration finally started to pull him back from sleep. It had a supernatural quality to it, distant yet immedi- ate. It was as if she was crying to him to set her free L cut the cables, abandon her, let her go her way. That part of it bothered him most L when he got to thinking shePd come alive, had taken hold on her destiny. She walked right into his head
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and found the power to cry aloud to him, only to him, and to no one else. It frightened and strengthened him at the same time. In that moment he jerked himself awake and shook with the shook with the peculiar shivers running through him. He checked his watch. He would like to think he shivered from the weather change, the spitting rain, but he knew better. It was four oPclock. He thought with re- lief that night wouldnPt hold him forever. It al- ways ended. Soon L he would look at her soon. Gomez wasnPt moving. Bobby picked up the two-way and tried the tug for some outside contact. He heard only static crackle, but still felt almost in touch. He kept on it until they finally came back to him, broken up but audible. The captain is sleeping, he was told. Bobby insisted on
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speaking with him. They shut the radio down on him while they went to pull their skipper out their skipper out of bed. He waited and the bad crackle of the two-way came back. The irritated captain reiterated the — 159 — obvious L they were doing five knots, the pres- sure from the props must have snapped the shaft chains. He promised to reduce speed, investigate, and repair at first light. There was no point stop- ping now, Bobby thought he heard the message. It was too dark to see or do anything. The tug signed off and Bobby still didnPt want to be alone in the dark. The kid in him wanted the covers over his head, feet tucked safely under the blanket edges. He decided to check in with Gomez. He suspected the Mexican knew. Gomez spoke before Bobby
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Gomez spoke before Bobby made the move. He had a way of reading BobbyPs thoughts. MYou hear eh, Bubby. She break loose, Bubby. She angry Lady.N Gomez rolled onto his back, slowly. MShe talk now, eh Bubby?N Bobby nodded invisibly in the darkness. MEsto no esta bueno. We stop. We wait. No sail now. She burn, catch fire sure.N MThey no stop, Gomez,N His English was work- ing like Gomez, Mslow down until light.N Bobby sat in discomfort and yet enjoyed the company. MThen we fix.N MToo fast.N Gomez was a realist. MChains no hold, we burn.N He wiped rain from his face. MWeather, Bubby, esta face. MWeather, Bubby, esta mal.N They sat there in silence, swaying with the spreading roll of The Lady against the waters. They listened as plumes of spray banged off her sides, feeling the slow build of the wind through the
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rigging and the rain against their faces. They tried to gauge its growth. Twenty minutes passed before Bobby got up, — 160 — his body rigid and unnatural. He rose as if God talked to him, startling Gomez. The Mexican watched as Bobby turned and headed astern. His words rolled back from him. MIPm going to look, IPve got to see what shePs doing.N The noise grew around noise grew around him as he moved to- wards it, his motion unsteady from the seas, his footing uncertain in the rain. Three quarters of the way astern he smelled the sear drifting out of her engine room. It chilled him. The faint beam of the flashlight at the top of the hatch outlined the smoky shadows drifting up and slipping out into the cool of the Gulf. He felt heat rising out of her, too. The heat
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and smoke combined with the anguished whine, making him decide to wait for better light. He waited, spending the time thinking what might still be down there to burn. He remem- bered lots of sludgy oil. Once the water was gone shePd get hot enough to catch fire, that was a cer- tainty. was a cer- tainty. The thought didnPt soothe him. He climbed into another door in his head, the empty room. He came back when the sky started breaking red to the east. He couldnPt wait any longer, and raised the tug, telling them he was ready L al- ready below, ready to work. HePd say anything to get shut down and stop the scream. He killed a few more minutes with the thought. The smoke didnPt let up but the sound fell off to less than intermittent. The silence cheered him. In a
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world of no mercies, neutrality made him happy. No noise meant no friction, no — 161 — no — 161 — heat, less chance of her exploding into flame while he was below. The lower he went the more it stunk L fresh burn. She made very little noise now, just tiny, whimpering sounds, coming with the absent roll and pitch. It was just bright enough to give him phantoms everywhere. The light picked up a little through the engine room vents, the smoke drifting up thick in free swirling shadows against it. There was little vis- ibility and breathing was almost impossible. He tied his kerchief across his face, something he should have done sooner. Acrid smoke slid into his lungs with every breath. He pulled the ker- chief tighter, wadded chief tighter, wadded part of it into his mouth, and
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sucked slow, shallow breaths. This did nothing to help the sting against his eyes. He waded thick-legged and blind to the shaft. There was no chain anywhere. The slime was thicker now, the water evaporated from the fric- tion. He worried theyPd start moving while he was wrapping the shaft. He had no plans to turn into ground beef. There was already too much absent roll in the shafts just from her pitch. He immersed himself in the effort, gagging and swallowing crap. Coughing up sludge, he worked submerged on the bottom of the shaft. He looked for chain. for chain. His fingers slid against the point where the links had parted from stress. Some of it he managed to double link. With some of it he reset the shackles to allow less play under pres- sure. It took him twenty minutes before he knew he
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— 162 — must leave or lose consciousness. He was almost blind now. It would have to do. He started to be- lieve he was going to die there. He tumbled across the shafts and groped himself onto the catwalk, certain he had left it too long. All thoughts left him but the quest for air. Each step transformed him until he saw him- self as a demon, at home in it, coming in it, coming from there to the world above. He floated in the imagery, until he neared the top and fell against the hatch- way, sliding back, losing consciousness. He was dying when the Lady took him, carried him the last tiny distance as a mother would her child. Lying on the deck, he searched to find con- sciousness but couldnPt. He collapsed in exhaus- tion, his body caring for itself, running on
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automatic. His lungs let go oil and smoked water. His mind had exited; gone to visit Tanya, to talk to her, ask her about school and her pretty dress. Did she miss him today? Time passed, minutes, days maybe. days maybe. He stayed with his daughter, smiling. He saw her wide eyes the first time he ever took her aboard ship. She was a lady of ships, his daughter, like the lady in every ship, the strength, the dignity, the honor. The tightness around his heart gave way as his lungs loosened their atrophy. He felt the rain on his face, and the conscious part of his mind found him. Keep breathing, it said. Get to your knees. Get to your daughter. It took time before he stood on shaky legs, still coughing, and spitting slime. He staggered his way forward, noticing the worsening weather and
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— 163 — the increased roll and skid of of the Lady as he worked harder for his footing. He hadnPt expected anything else. He found Gomez awake and more alert. HePd been securing their shelter a little. MEstas muerto, Bubby?N His eyes took in the spectacle of someone back from the dead or head- ing to it. MEres muy macho, Bubby.N It perked him to have somebody notice the wear and tear. The effort hadnPt been in complete obscurity. MYou a filthy man too, Bubby.N Gomez smiled. Bobby squatted as Gomez stood. MI help now, amigo.N He flexed his good arm. MStrong now.N He grinned. He tried a Mr. Universe posture with his torso and slipped back into the back into the pain mode. He tried to hide it as he forced his bad arm up again. MNo pain.N He fell
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